Do You Have a Vision for Your Marriage?
January 7, 2011
Matt and I just returned from our 2nd annual marriage retreat and we had an awesome time! Matt wrote a great blog and I’ve posted it here…
Martha and I just returned from a get away trip to the mountains. This is the second year in a row that we have been blessed to spend a few days praying and planning the year. We used the Mountaintop of Marriage resource by Jimmy and Karen Evans again this year. Let me share with you a few highlights of our retreat…
- I am now convinced that it is essential for a husband and wife to spend a couple of days together every year to pray, share, plan and get a clear vision for your marriage. Personally I like the beginning of the year as you get fresh vision for what God wants to do.
- Men, you need to take the initiative and plan the trip. This will speak your wife’s love language and let her know that you really value her. I’m not saying that the women can’t be involved in the planning, at least the first trip, but it’s one way to step up as the leader in your home.
- Use a Bible based resource. I highly recommend Jimmy and Karen Evans workbook. It’s designed as a Vision Retreat Guidebook for Couples. It guides you through your vision, goals and action items for every area of your family and personal life.
- This is not only huge for you marriage but it’s huge for your children. It gives you a chance to think and pray for each child individually and in our busy lives sometimes we don’t do enough of that. (or at least I don’t)
- Be HONEST and LISTEN. This is something that is very hard for me sometimes. But it is very important to listen to what is on your spouse’s heart. It’s important to hear how you can improve otherwise what’s the point! Remember your spouse is often sharing their perceptions or feelings.
- Have Fun! Although we spent about 8 hours (4 different sessions) sharing and planning we still found time to go snow skiing and yes we did some shopping of course
- I’ve learned that there is a dream in the heart of Martha and one of my primary roles as her husband is to pray for her and help provide a healthy environment for her to live out her dream. It’s not about me!
- And then we need to have good follow through. After you get home from the retreat take some time to implement your action plan and communicate with your family.
So let me encourage you to find at least one night in the next few months and get away with your spouse for a strategic retreat. The investment will be worth it… not just for this year but for an eternity.